Thursday, November 11, 2010

The Love Dare Bible Study - Session 3, Part 1

Honoring and Cherishing Your Spouse

Session 3, Part 1

Gear Up

Honor can be defined as holding someone in high esteem, viewing someone or something as rare or special.

What words in this scripture describe a marriage of honor?

1Peter 3:7-8 (NIV)

"Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers. Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble."

What is one result of a husband not being considerate of his wife?

Your spouse is as much a part of you as your hand, your eyes, or your heart. Honor (or lack of it) becomes apparent in our conversations with one another---and with God. Our words, reactions, facial expressions, and tone of voice all shout a clear message to our spouses. They cry out "You are priceless to me!" or "You are worthless to me!"

Let's take a look at the statements below:

"She used to love to call me. Now it seems the only time she calls is when she wants something."

"My husband is so selfish! He thinks clean socks just fly from the hamper to the washer and dryer, and then back to the drawer."

"Making love…It has turned into a duty. How can I enjoy intimacy with someone who drives me crazy?"

"She's a total ditz when it comes to finances. She barely knows how to write a check, much less balance a checkbook."

Are these statements that honor our spouses?

What should come out of our mouths instead? Why?

Are there any times you are more vulnerable to saying hurtful words to your spouse?

Ephesians 4:25-27, 29 describes how "rotten talk" can become a habit, gradually eroding relationships.

"25 Therefore, putting away lying, "Let each one of you speak truth with his neighbor," for we are members of one another. 26 "Be angry, and do not sin": do not let the sun go down on your wrath, 27 nor give place to the devil. 29 Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers."

What do you think is meant by verse 27, "nor give place to the devil." ?

Jesus is the perfect example of viewing people as priceless and of great value – valuable enough to die for. He related to each person through a "lens" of honor and respect.

Depending on the lens you are looking through, by the way you interact, you are either telling your spouse he/she is priceless or worthless. Place a check under what you are communicating to your spouse in the areas below.

What I Tell My Spouse…            You Are Priceless!        You Are Worthless!

with my words

by how I treat his/her body

through meeting his/her needs

by how I make requests

with my behavior in conflict

by keeping my commitments

The Bible tells husbands to love their wives in the same way Christ loved the church (Eph. 5:25). When you love and honor your spouse, you are honoring and respecting Christ. The opposite is also the case.

The Love Dare
This Week: Read and Do - Day 8, Day 9, & Day 10.